Tricolor Cat Bread

Hello my friends! Martha is finally back, and ready to deliver more of these manageable recipes. I’ve been away for a while, sure. But does that make me a bad person? No, but there are plenty of other things that do… Look, you move across the country and start a new job in a brand new state, and tell me how much time you have to blog.

Manageability – Easy. Bread.

Anyhoot, this week I made this adorable cat-shaped bread. Is it manageable? Shit yes it is. It’s easy. It’s bread. Now it’s kindof annoying because you have to make three different types of bread, and rye flour is harder to find than I anticipated. But those tiny annoyances are not that important. They don’t matter, because in the end you have cat-shaped bread, and it’s cute. Anything that is cat-shaped is worth it in the end. If you had a huge birthmark on your forehead, but it was shaped like a cat, I’d still date you. I used the Tricolor Braid Recipe by Taste of Home to furnish the three colors, but before I started the braid I used a medium-sized cat pan and just pressed the form out. You’ll see below. Plus, I had still had some leftovers, so I was able to make a little braid with what I had left. So I had plenty to eat, and a cat to display. Win/win. Meow/meow.

Ingredients

  • 2 packages (1/4 ounce each) active dry yeast
  • 2-1/3 cups warm water (110° to 115°), which to me is pretty hot. I mean, that’s “hot tub” temp, so…
  • 1/4 cup butter, softened
  • 2 tablespoons honey
  • 3 teaspoons salt
  • 3-1/3 to 3-2/3 cups all-purpose flour
  • Wheat Dough
  • 2 tablespoons toasted wheat germ
  • 2 tablespoons molasses
  • 1 cup plus 2 to 5 tablespoons whole wheat flour
  • Pumpernickel Dough
  • 2 tablespoons baking cocoa
  • 2 tablespoons molasses
  • 1 cup plus 2 to 5 tablespoons rye flour
  • 1 egg white
  • 1 tablespoon water

Directions

  1. In a large bowl, dissolve yeast in warm water. Add butter, honey, salt and 2-1/3 cups flour; beat for 2 minutes. Divide evenly among three bowls. This is where you get three different color doughs.
  2. To the first bowl, stir in enough remaining all-purpose flour to form a stiff dough. Boom, white bread.
  3. Turn onto a floured surface; knead until smooth and elastic, about 6-8 minutes. Place in a greased bowl, turning once to grease top. Cover and set aside.
  4. Add wheat germ and molasses to the second bowl. Beat until smooth. Stir in enough wheat flour to make a stiff dough. Boom, wheat bread.
  5. Turn onto a floured surface; knead until smooth and elastic, about 6-8 minutes. Place in a greased bowl, turning once to grease top. Cover and set aside.
  6. Add cocoa and molasses to the third bowl. Beat until smooth. Stir in enough rye flour to make a stiff dough. Boom, pumpernickel.
  7. Turn onto a floured surface; knead until smooth and elastic, about 6-8 minutes. Place in a greased bowl, turning once to grease top. Cover. Let all three bowls rise in a warm place until doubled, about 1 hour.
  8. For the cat shape – Wad all three together so they have a common centerpoint, then press down from the top with your cat-shaped pan. Move to step 10. If you want to make the braid and you hate cats and you’re an evil monster, go to step 9.
  9. Punch doughs down; divide each in half. Shape each portion into a 15-in. rope. Place a rope of each dough on a greased baking sheet and braid; seal ends. Repeat with remaining ropes.
  10. Cover and let rise until doubled, about 45 minutes. Beat egg white and water; brush over braids.
  11. Bake at 350° for 25-30 minutes or until golden brown. Remove to wire racks to cool.
  12. Meow.
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